David Parkin on Northern exposure, dog days on the train and being mistaken for a success

IT seems the Northern Powerhouse remains le subject du jour (as they are wont to say in Cleckheaton).

Last week’s observations ensured plenty of feedback – leading to an entertaining swapping of texts with Leeds City Region LEP chairman Roger Marsh which ended with a few names of who both of us wouldn’t want to be lashed to in a three legged marathon.

The Northern Powerhouse raised its head again this week at an economic seminar hosted by Santander featuring its UK chief economist Barry Naisbitt.

After an interesting presentation, he was keen to get the thoughts of the business people in the audience and I was kindly put right in the frame by Neil Williams, Santander’s regional director in Yorkshire, who suggested I may harbour an opinion.

Can’t think why?

I said that for the Northern Powerhouse to really work it needs to embrace major transport and infrastructure investment as well as regional devolution.

I’d been reminded of the limitations of travelling across the Pennines earlier this week when I sprinted to catch a train from Leeds to Manchester.

Even though it wasn’t leaving at peak time, it was still packed with passengers and as I wriggled down a carriage I spotted a spare seat.

“Yes the seat’s free but there is a dog under the table,” said the lady in the adjacent seat.

I assured her and its owner that I like dogs and I wouldn’t step on it and then wedged myself into the seat with legs akimbo to ensure the solid looking Staffordshire bull terrier had enough space to relax.

The rest of the journey was spent with the dog panting near my lap.

Despite hot dog breath on my groin I probably had worse train journeys when I went interrailing when a teenager.

Come to think of it, I’ve probably had less memorable amorous experiences.

A bloke with several earrings in the seat next to the dog’s owner, then said: “I like dogs. I had a dog once, it was called Malcolm. He was a bit too randy so we had him seen to.”

It reminded me of someone I know called Malcolm who is also rather lively. I don’t think anyone has thought about getting him “seen to”, but it might be an idea.

The dog’s owner didn’t appear to want to engage in a long conversation about canines so the chap with the earrings went back to crayoning satantic symbols in a colouring book.

Arriving at Manchester I headed to San Carlo, the popular Italian restaurant, where Prolific North, the media news website, was hosting a dinner for sponsors and exhibitors at its Prolific North Live event, held earlier this year.

It was an interesting evening but I missed part of the discussion as I was concentrating on trying to get the better one of two bottles of red wine moved closer to my seat.

I can display ruthless focus in such situations.

As I left the dinner I said goodbye to Robert McClements, the chief executive of CDi Yorkshire, which represents printing businesses in the region.

He half turned in his seat and said it would be good to catch up again “if you ever returned my calls”.

A bizarre comment, which isn’t true, but perhaps his paranoia is a product of concern that the public sector gravy train he’s spent years tapping into is finally coming to a juddering halt.

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IT’S been a week of compliments.

No sooner had I arrived at the Ward Hadaway Fastest 50 Awards event in Leeds last Friday than one lady said to me: “You look like someone famous.”

I proceeded with caution: the last time someone said that they compared me to former Lib Dem minister Simon Hughes.

“Oh dear, I hope it’s someone nice,” I answered.

“Yes it is, it’s that footballer,” she replied.

That was more promising – footballers are known for being young, fit and virile, qualities I do share.

“Which one?”

“Oh, you know, the one on the telly…the alcoholic…Paul Merson, that’s him.”

Great.

Later the same day, at the Bardsey Beer Festival, I was chatting to Elizabeth Harrison, marketing and communications manager of sponsors Reward Finance.

Introduced by my former colleague Ian Briggs, who now has Reward as a public relations client, Elizabeth said she had seen a photo of me on publicity for the upcoming Yorkshire Lord’s Taverners Balloon Debate which I am compering and where Reward have a table.

It’s always nice to be recognised and it went some way to soothing my ego after the earlier lookalike comparison.

“I thought you were an accountant,” she said.

Have a great Easter weekend.

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