WHAT’S your preferred reading matter when you are sitting in the reception of a large law firm, accountancy firm or bank?
I can’t remember the last time I sat down and found a copy of a local or even national newspaper or magazine that looked like it had even been read by one person.
They have often got a large screen TV with BBC or Sky news on which tends to attract the attention of visitors.
I wonder if you could do a survey on the amount of money spent on untouched reading matter in office receptions? I bet some university researchers have beaten me to it.
I got a surprise recently when I went to the offices of a major firm and found a copy of the children’s comic The Beano on every coffee table in their reception area.
I found it quite appealing that those at the firm, very serious individuals at the top of their game, had the confidence and sense of humour to put the comic so prominently in their office.
I even picked one up and read it for the first time since childhood.
Mini the Minx was still there, and of course, dear old Dennis the Menace and Gnasher. And Billy Whizz.
I can’t say I haven’t read a comic since schooldays as I was an avid reader of adult comic Viz when I was a student and still laugh at some of its daft, filthy humour when someone drops it into a Facebook post.
The Beano’s Loopy Limericks page caught my eye.
Here’s one for you:
There was was a farmer from Leeds
Who swallowed a packet of seeds
It soon came to pass
He was covered in grass
But he has all the tomatoes he needs
I’m sure Viz could provide an alternative version.
Or what about this one:
There was a young man called Bill Beeby
Who wanted to marry Miss Phoebe
Overcome by her doubt
The poor girl cried out:
“I don’t want to be called Phoebe Beeby!
I’m glad the senior partner I was meeting didn’t stroll into reception while I was studying the Beano and earnestly scribbling those down in my note book.
:::
IT was one of those sad quirks of fate that just as the Australian soap opera Neighbours was celebrating its 30th anniversary, the death was announced of the woman who wrote its theme song.
British singer-songwriter Jackie Trent died last month at the age of 74 and while penning the Neighbours tune was one thing she did in her long-running career, there were bigger highlights such as writing hits for Petula Clark and Frank Sinatra and topping the charts herself with Where Are You Now (My Love) in 1965.
I remember sitting next to the then chief barker of the Variety Club, Tony Hatch, at the Yorkshire Business Awards some years ago and chatting to him about his songwriting career.
He was married to Jackie Trent and the couple wrote more than 400 songs together with Shirley Bassey, Jack Jones, Nancy Wilson, Des O’Connor, Val Doonican, Vikki Carr, and Dean Martin among the other stars to take on their material.
I’m still shame-faced that I was more impressed that Hatch had co-written the Neighbours songs rather than lots of other classic ballads.
I managed to stop myself singing it to him. I think as a student I had nothing better to do than watch Neighbours twice a day.
Up to that point most Brits had thought of Australia as covered in wild outback.
But the prospect of meeting Kylie Minogue got many of us pondering that a holiday on the suburban streets of Melbourne wouldn’t be the worst trip we’d ever been on.
But enough of this wistfulness. Back to Tony Hatch.
His late wife was born Yvonne Burgess in Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire, but she changed her name to Jackie Trent, adopting part of the name of the nearby Potteries town.
And later with Hatch, she wrote Stoke City’s 1972 League Cup final song We’ll Be With You. It reached number 34 in the charts and is still played at all Stoke City’s games.
As I’m sure Yorkshire-based dealmakers and Potters’ fans Mark Eardley of Langcliffe Merger Connect, David Hardless of Park Place Corporate Finance and Jonathan Jones of Squire Patton Boggs will be able to tell you.
At length.
Don’t ask Hardless or Eardley whether they know celebrity Stoke fan Nick Hancock, that’s an even longer story.
:::
IF Rory McIlroy wins the US Masters on Sunday, he’ll do it wearing a fluorescent green shirt.
Sadly I don’t have a hotline to the McIlroy camp in Augusta.
Or even a high up contact at Nike, the US sportswear giant that signed an estimated $250m 10 year contract with the Northern Irish golfer in January 2013.
The deal dwarfed the contract rival adidas had with David Beckham and clearly put Rory at the top of the Nike tree above former world number one Tiger Woods, who was the first golfing superstar signed by Nike and who effectively opened the door to the group’s entry into the golf market.
The only reason I know what McIlroy will be wearing is that his outfits for the four days of the Masters were all on display at Moor Allerton Golf Club in Leeds over the Easter weekend when I made my first faltering foray onto the golf course this year.
Nike’s meticulous planning and promotion is not surprising given its vast investment in the likeable McIlroy, who only has the Masters to win to complete a career grand slam at the tender age of 25.
If you are playing this weekend watch out for the club member sporting the latest Nike gear, including that acid green shirt.
“He’ll need to be leading the tournament when he starts his final round to justify that eye-catching shirt,” I commented to my playing partner, a member at Moor Allerton.
“I think he’ll do well, I’m just concerned that if he does win then that shirt won’t half clash with the Masters’ green jacket,” observed my golfing companion.
Have a great weekend.
